...i cant shake the thought of her...Shes like heroin..i get physical pain and emptyness without her..withdrawls like a mutherfucker....i wake up , half drunk, with the hole in my heart feeling like a SUCKER for love...and indeed thats what i am...i did the player thing cant noone tell me shit about getting some fine california women....im the best mayne i did that...in the end tho i never felt complete...i had them lined up...way too many....then i fell in love with her....it was great...ive never felt so alive before and maybe i never will again....mistakes were made tho and i did hide away and spent less time with alot of friends who i should have probably stayed around....but like i said i was in love....well thats all gone now and im hiding away again but this time in france...but i cant stop thinking about love....and not just how i love her but how i love my friends too..AYO..you mean the world to me brother...youve taught me so much its rediculous...about women, about bein a man, about friendship etc etc...and when i was going thru breakup and came back to kick it with you... you understood and that was a big help man.....Gary...stay healthy homeboy...we been thru so much and youve proven to me over and over that you got my back in rough situations, weather its people trying to harm me or just someone to talk to about these issues in life.....we lost our best friend together ...that shit wasnt easy and i think about jonny, and robbie all the time...i knwo u do tooo....Ralphie: i dont think reads my blog but if you are homie you allready know....were never gonna shake each other even if we tried...were too much alike except the beer vs weed argument.....If i could tell u anything is to stay positive cuz your a grumpy muthafucka....get out in the world more shit weill fall in place for you....most people r fake as fuck and your not so just make somethin happen man....u aint got no kids like me ...we can still make moves player...no reason to wait for something.....CHARLIE:...fuck homie i miss you too...u stay keeping me laughing...and eating haha...we discovered alot in cali together(mostly restraunts) and its allways good times with you my man....
theres so many people i want to thank.........i got love for all my peoples and theyre alot of you out there ...ZORE,FEAR,HYDE: my talented innovator real true homeboys lets get the ball really moving and make some money...we can paint walls forever...and we will....thats allways gonna be there....but if we find ways to stay live and eating off art then we must do it....the potential is within us i see it and you see it....we all know it aint easy but perhaps well find a way to make it worthwhile.....fame on the streets vs. commercial art...is there a balance??? i think thats another blog post alltogether.......
Danyell and Mekka:...become friends again...thats my wish anyways...your both really cool chicks and i love you both as friends and ill admit even more then friends but thats just me being a guy( yes a guy who likes black girls)....but it saddens me you dont get along anymore for whatever reason and if it saddens you on some level call each other....at least try it...plus if you both sucseed in fashion your gonna have to see each other again...it trips me out how all of a sudden im in the fashion industry too but i guess thats gods plan for me....ive been meeting the best contacts in fashion out here ....lets all be friends again and make soem serious money im not even joking......
ATARA:..u say u dont read this but i think you do....youve been there for me the past few months even tho i felt unable to put my neck on the line , and was unfair with my heart, as i still have feelings for her....but i do realize that i got alot of love for you, and your so kind and down to earth and real about things and it keeps me and my thoughts grounded...so keep doing that for me please....i bring up the past alot and thats a n issue i have to work on...but your helping me work on that....i look forward to coming back to ontario and see where i stand with you
CHER:..... i wish it was diffrent....but it aint...just please be carefull out there......
those i didnt mention its not cuz i forgot...if i mentioned all my friends back home id be here forever....
anyways liek i said...woke up with that empty feeling i needed a nice walk and i ended up at the louvre which is the biggest art museum in the world....france ended up jacking alot of art from egypt so most of the pics are all that shit....they even had a painting, on the celing, which portrayed the jacking...im out for now.....peep the pics:
You're still drinking? Oh no, I thought you stopped? Anyways, keep your head up.
ReplyDelete"An individual has not started living until he can rise above the narrow confines of his individualistic concerns to the broader concerns of all humanity." - MLK
Don't I always say shit like that? The homie put that out in the world a long time ago. And today, I'm able to pick it out of the collective consciousness and utilize it in my life. And that is the most powerful thing I have ever learned or realized I could do.
yea im not a martyr tho...noone cares what i say cept my friends....i dont have a big butt and a smile....you got that attraction power...i dont...they shot that man for saying things like that....they shut him the fuck down...i want to live in love....mlk is a great man but thats not me...my individual feelings and the feelings of my friends is all that matters to me...people these days dont want to be saved...not by me anyways...i think one day youll see that helping an individual who cares is better then helping the whole of humanity that doesnt care....much love tho
ReplyDeleteby the way when MLK said those things...he had a strong woman who had his back, and she didnt shake it when it got rough....even with his side bitc`hes and all that....
ReplyDeleteWhat the fuck is that supposed to mean? What does that have to do with anything? I am appalled at the fact that the conversation has turned into something totally unrelated to what he said. I have no interest in discussing his relationship with his WIFE. You truly just don't understand what that quote is saying. Or at least how one can use to get to where they're going in life.
ReplyDeleteit means in order for him to say and do those great things he needed the support of someone who was more than likeley stronger than him...peace
ReplyDeletethat is true...most great men were, and are, flanked by an equally if not more great woman. sometimes it is hard for chicks to understand this...
ReplyDeleteeverything revolves around the chase of a woman's tail...in this we have great power and there is no shame in this game.
...and it really doesn't have to be one way or the other...this world is based on an act of supreme divine love and the art of creation---both of these attributes exist in every woman, which is why, if she knows who she is, she can create and support not just herself but entire nations.
the truth is a hard pill to swallow, gonzo. don't worry...love is great once you tasted it, but even greater once it decides to stick around for awhile-without judgement, of course!
(goodness gracious...that was soo damn sappy---but i just had to do it)
can you get me some dope street jewelry in paris?
just for clarification...this in no way takes away from one's own growth as a human, female or male...it's just food for thought and a personal understanding of your last response...and truth be told, no woman/man is an island---if we could all just loosen up a bit, everything would be so much fun!
ReplyDeleteim feelin you yanni and no jewelry , not yet....but dont worry im coming back with gifts for all( ok some) lol...but your included....
ReplyDelete